In love 16 Years NUS

18 Oct 2020 Admin

NUS – National University of Singapore, this was the only thing that ran in my mind all day; All day I was busy studying for the NUS gate exams. I was preparing for the exams without taking breaks for to shit or piss. My mock exam grades went high, I topped the school. The finals came, I did my best.

The exams got over but I was still worried, I thought, what if I lose the gate, so started preparing again for the next trial. I was mad about Martina, I couldn’t think of anything else other than her. No fun! No friends! All in my head was Martina. My life became monotonous, I wake up eat, study, sleep  it was my routine and I was never bored of it. I was madly deeply truly in love with Martina.

The results were out in the net.  My dreams was out in the open; I had to wait all night for the page to open up due to the server and internet speed which was dial up in 2001. Finally it was 3 in the morning when the page opened. With all prayers I entered my roll card number and hit the enter key, the 30 seconds waiting time looked like a life time. The page opened, my eye balls ran up and down the sheet, calculating the scores. I scored 94% in the HSE which was beyond my belief. 

In other two days got my SAT results, I scored an average. With my HSE and SAT scores I applied for the NUS. 

After a month I got an email from NUS stating I had been selected for the Under Graduate Course of Electrical and Computer Engineering. My heart skipped a beat. I took a print out of the confirmation letter and marched back home like a Knight in the shining armour. I would see the printed copy every now and then to make sure that I wasn’t day dreaming.

When I reached home, saw a car parked in front of the porch, thought some guest have come home. With no much care went inside my home. I was shocked to surprise because It was Martina’s Dad and Mom sitting in our living room. My heart skipped a beat for the second time, My thoughts threaded an imaginative story of how come this ass sorry Martina’s Dad knew about my NUS selection. I thought he has come to strangle me to death. 

Strange but true; he smiled at me, enquired me about my studies and health. I couldn’t react or reply, I still was in the state of shock seeing him smiling at me. I hurried myself to the kitchen searching Mom. There; I found Martina, she was helping Mom preparing tea. My heart skipped a beat for the third time; she winked and took the tea to serve. 

I had to pinch myself to check that I wasn’t day dreaming; I pulled my Mom aside and asked “What’s happening here, Is she engaged to someone? Have they come here to invite us?”  Mom smiled “Grow up Son you’re getting engaged” I said “What?” Mom whispered “You are getting engaged to Martina this Sunday at Peter’s church” I still couldn’t believe what I just heard and I was feeling dizzy! I fell dead on to the ground!!

When I woke up Martina was beside me. Everyone was there looking at me. I couldn’t look at anyone. I was feeling shy and it made my Mom feel bad, she came near and said “Don’t make us look bad, get up and get ready!!”

I still couldn’t understand what was happening? Evening, I went to Dad and asked “What is happening? Why is there an engagement? How come her Dad changed his mind and accepted it?” My Dad was silent for a while and said “In two weeks you are getting married to Martina” I was more confused now and asked “Dad!! is her dad sick? Is he going to die soon?” Dad walked away without a word.

I met Martina at the park. She was there waiting for me with her Mom and Dad, they left us giving us some space. We walked away from them, when I was sure I was far enough I asked her “Is your Dad going to die or is something wrong with your Mom’s health? why there is an engagement plan in a hurry?” She smiled  and said “Why? Don’t you want to marry me?” I said “Nah it’s not what I meant, don’t you think we are too young to get married? We are just 16! As you wished I got selected in NUS. We can study together, then we can work together, then we could get married, Wouldn’t that be wonderful” She sat on the bench and asked  “Why can’t we marry and then study together? Would that be a problem for you? Please say sir if there is a problem say it now so that I could stop the marriage you can marry later as you liked!!” I immediately replied “No… no… we’ll marry and then we’ll study, no problemoo!!”  She laughed out loud, she was laughing loud, suddenly she gasped for breath and fell unconscious with blood bleeding from her nose. I screamed for help, I shook her, she was unconscious took her on my shoulders ran towards the gate. Martina’s Mom and Dad came running towards me. 

We were in Apollo. She was taken to the ICU. I was not allowed, wires were running around her body, injections drips were being plugged. I never took my eyes of her. Doctors were explaining her Dad about the treatments. Martina’s Dad was normal; I was puzzled to see him normal. I saw her Mom praying with a rosary in her hand; went near her and asked “What is happening? Is something wrong with Martina? Is this why there is an engagement?” She couldn’t help but cry with silence. Her dad came sat near me “Its time that you know the truth, Martina is one among the patient who is affected by Glioblastoma Multiforme (GBM IV), which is a kind of tumour that grows inside the brain, as of now there is no medical cure or any surgical treatment. If we try to remove it through trial surgery, she may go brain dead and the least possibility of survival is 3% which would equally kill her. The time given to her is 3 – 6 months. The only wish she wished was to get married to you” I stared at him with silence, hearing this I wasn’t able to sit I slipped on to the floor, he hugged me tight. I started to cry out loud, the scream went roof high I couldn’t hold back myself “Am sorry but we are helpless and please don’t cry in front of her. She doesn’t want to see you hurt” I couldn’t stand there any more I ran like a mad dog out of the hospital. I ran towards the church. I yelled as much as I could at the closed doors of the church. I threw stones at the door, I was angry I yelled again and again. 

Vicky came running and said that I was being enquired by the doctor. Went to the hospital. Mom and dad were there. Doctor came out of the ICU asking for me, I slowly walked towards him and said “I am Subbu” doctor said “Subbu, Martina wants to meet you but I want you to be careful of what you speak;  keep your emotions under control” I nodded. The ICU was damn cold; went near her bed I closed my eyes as I couldn’t see her with all those wires and tubes injected in her. She smiled, I smiled; tears dropped down to cheek and fell on her hand. I said “It’s the dusts Vicky drove the bike fast so the dirt might have made it teary, leave that, So how are you feeling, are you okay now?” I dragged; “Don’t be lazy, get up now. We have works to do! Remember we are getting married coming weekend” She smiled and said “Love you” tear drop rolled from her eyes. I said “Shusssh!! there are more patients here, its public place madam so no public display of love say it low” She whispered “I love you” I kissed in her in the forehead. We spoke less; stared at each other and our silence spoke a lot. She then slept and I was staring her like a doll.

A couple of days later she was back normal. We were set for our wedding. Finally the day came July 17 2001 the wedding day. I stood with the best man Vicky and she came in with her Dad. She was dressed in white with saffron borders, her bride hat made her look more gorgeous than she was. As she stepped in, the music was on, she was like an angel walking down the church hall, and it was like a movie where all your dreams are coming true. She came near me and asked “How do I look?” I replied “You look like my wife!” She smiled and gave me a punch. Father grunted and rolled his eyes, we became silent. The prayer began and I was waiting for the father to say “Now you can kiss the bride” and the moment came I kissed her in front of the whole gathering with a pride, saying now she is my wife.

We had a small get-together back home; very close family and friends were invited. I saw happiness in her parent’s eyes, I thanked my Dad and Mom for what they have done. We were having fun. We were asked to dance as it was a special moment I didn’t refuse. A romantic song was played and we were dancing. I danced with ease with love in my heart, I wasn’t trembled because I was looking into her eyes. I was asking God with a needy heart to make her live long. I expected the church bell to ring but it never rang. She asked “What happen didn’t he reply to you? He has given us enough don’t ask him anymore he can’t help you now its way out of his reach” she smiled and fell unconscious on the floor.

Doctors came running and did their best. She was in her last stage. I couldn’t believe myself as it was happening so soon. Her Mom was crying with a rosary in her hand, her Dad was in deep silence. I was called into the room. I went into the room, sat near her. I couldn’t see her with incubator, wires and tubes hanging around her body. I hung my head down and wept; she touched my hand and asked me to take off the incubator. I took the incubator off she gasped for a second and said in a shrilled voice “Hey it’s our first night, If you cry! what would people think about me huh!!?” I smiled with all tears running down the cheekShe said “Don’t worry dude! I would be watching you from the sky and would be there for you whenever you need me” I nodded in silence “Dude I need you to find a girl not good as me but a better one by our next anniversary” I gave her a sad look and kept silent. She said “I don’t know what you do, where you’ll find her, but you’ll have to find her and this is my last wish. I hope you understand that this is your wife’s last wish hope you’ll fulfil it”

I never spoke a word, she said “I know you’d hate me for what I said but you have to move on, there is no more time for us. So do it for the sake of me” I nodded with disagreement. I was about to leave cause I couldn’t take it anymore she called me and said “Hey husband, this is our first night and you are leaving me alone here. What would people think about me, come here and lie next to me. Please, come here just spend the night with me, this might be even our last night too” I went and laid beside her, she hugged me tightly and whispered “Hope I could stay like this forever and ever” I kissed her on the forehead and said “Sleep now everything will be fine”

The next day morning when I woke up she was cold, my heart skipped a beat, tried to wake her up but she was no more there; she has already left leaving me alone, I cried out loud. Hearing the cry people came running in; Doctor tried to separate her from me but they couldn’t, people tried to pull her hand from me but they couldn’t; she was holding me tight. But when I unfolded her hand she unfolded easily. I understood the feeling of love, she wants me to leave her; people carried her away from  me, I sat there with disbelief, I couldn’t believe that she was gone, someone just tapped my shoulder, I couldn’t believe my eyes cause she was standing there; glowing like a full-moon and said “How could I go without even saying a goodbye!! I know you would feel bad that's why I came back, she kissed me and said goodbye.....Tata.....Take Care...will be watching you from there” she vanished into the air…..I woke up from the chair and saw her resting in peace in the living room...

………Love is divine but no divine love has lived long………

- Subbu

P.S. This is an imaginary story which is based on pure lies. 

Sivaraj Parameswaran